Love of the Lord

In Greek, there are three different words for love: Philia, Éros, and Agápe. While they all mean love in one way or another, each has a slightly different meaning.

Philia (philía) means friendship in modern Greek. It is a dispassionate but virtuous love, which includes the love for your friends, family, and community.

Éros (érōs) is a passionate love with sensual desire and longing. It is one step further than philia. This is the love used to describe a dating relationship, spouse, or life partner.

Agápe (agápē) directly means "love" in modern day Greek. It is true love, a deep, everlasting, all-giving love.

In the gospel reading John 21:1-19, Jesus reveals himself to his disciples for the third time since his resurrection. He speaks to Simon Peter around a campfire, which if you remember correctly is also where Simon Peter was warming himself when he denied the Lord three times in the courtyard. Here, Jesus asks Simon Peter is he loves him three times as well. Understanding the Greek words for love, makes this passage so much more powerful.

Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Agápe] Me?”
Simon Peter said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I [Philia] You.”
He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”

Jesus said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Agápe] Me?”
He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I [Philia] You.”
He said to him, “Tend My sheep.”

Jesus said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Philia] Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you [Philia] Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I [Philia]You.”
Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.

Simon Peter is unable to give Jesus the specific kind of love Jesus asks from him. Simon Peter can give him virtuous love but is unable to offer a deep, everlasting, all-giving love. But Jesus finally accepts that Simon Peter is loving him as much as he is capable.

This makes me think about what kind of love I am giving the Lord? Philia or Agápe? Am I loving him the most that I possibly can? Hearing and understanding the Greek was a real news flash for me. I realized that I am capable of loving the Lord so much more than I already am. Why am I holding back? What's stopping me? Why am I afraid?