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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

HGTV

I don't know if you all out there in cyber world watch much T.V. (I know I very rarely have time) but when I do, I love watching HGTV (Channel 67), which features shows on homes and gardens, deocrating, and home improvement. LOVE IT! I think in another life, (or perhaps if I were more ambitious) I would have been an architect. I love seeing the designs of homes in the United States as well as abroad. I could probably be a realtor as well, except I would probably want to steal every awesome house/apartment I find from one of my clients. Haha... My favorite show is House Hunters, but I also enjoy watching Holmes with Homes, The Outdoor Room, and Curb Appeal.

I can't wait until I am able to purchase my first real home or nice apartment. (I don't count the apartments I live in each summer.) I just want a place to call my own, with my own comfy bed, library of books, McCoy pottery, hand-me down couch, and Goodwill kitchen plates. I am so excited, I am actually watching HGTV right now!

I kind of feel like once I have all that, the right guy will come along, and my fairytale can begin. Not that I am waiting on a guy or anything... :)

Monday, April 26, 2010

My Mom's Thought in My Own Words

Everyone feels love differently, and therefore, you have to adjust the way you show people that you love them in order to meet their needs. It doesn't always work to show someone you love them in the same way that you hope someone will show you, because everyone is different. Adjust. Change. Make sure that the person you love, really and truly understands the way you feel.

I think this is a problem of mine. I try to show people I love them by the ways that I think are sufficient, but maybe I am not getting my point across. I need to understand how those people want to be loved and love them that way with hugs or kisses or small gifts or appreciation or compliments. This, I will work on.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Quote of the Day

"If there is no passion in your life, then have you really lived? Find your passion, whatever it may be. Become it and let it become you, and you will find great things happen FOR you, TO you and BECAUSE of you."

T. Alan Armstrong

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Work

Why is everything always so much work? Finding a job, playing a sport, getting what you want in life, keeping relationships strong... it's exhausting. Sometimes I just want to sit and do nothing and just be happy.

You hear a lot or maybe I've just heard a lot... that relationships are work. You have to work at staying together and work to please one another. I went to a wedding where a priest said, you have to out sacrifice your spouse. You have to try to win by out sacrificing your husband, because if you are both working to make the relationship stronger, it will be stronger. But why does it have to be so much work? Every relationship I've ever been in has been so much work, until it comes to a point that I start to think, is this too much work? Should it really be this hard? I don't feel like it's worth all the stress and pain when I have to work so hard just for it to even be decent...

And then you hear a lot or maybe I've just heard a lot... that anything worth having is worth working for. So then, is it better to have to work so hard in order to see those benefits? Should I continue working, hoping for the best? But what if the benefits don't ever come? What if our relationship is never better? What if I never throw the javelin to provisionally qualify? What if I don't land a great job?

It's hard, but I'm still working... for now.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

An Interview...

Today, I got my first job interview in awhile. And don't get me wrong, I am happy about it, but one of the biggest reasons I got the interview was because my sister who currently works with the company, referred me. While I appreciate my sister's help and I know networking is huge part of landing a job, I just wish someone would look at my resume, cover letter, references, etc. and say, "Wow! We'd be crazy to let this girl go!"

It sounds dumb, but I know I am a hard worker, and I know I give everything I do my all. And I know that am a quick learner, and that I have had three great internships to prepare me for the real world. But no one else can see that, unless they give me a job.

People I know keep saying, "Don't worry Ali, you're a great person, you'll get a job!" But those people know who I am and what I am really like. Employers don't know that. Which I guess goes to prove that referrals are just as good as landing a job on your own... it just doesn't feel like it.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Love of the Lord

In Greek, there are three different words for love: Philia, Éros, and Agápe. While they all mean love in one way or another, each has a slightly different meaning.

Philia (philía) means friendship in modern Greek. It is a dispassionate but virtuous love, which includes the love for your friends, family, and community.

Éros (érōs) is a passionate love with sensual desire and longing. It is one step further than philia. This is the love used to describe a dating relationship, spouse, or life partner.

Agápe (agápē) directly means "love" in modern day Greek. It is true love, a deep, everlasting, all-giving love.

In the gospel reading John 21:1-19, Jesus reveals himself to his disciples for the third time since his resurrection. He speaks to Simon Peter around a campfire, which if you remember correctly is also where Simon Peter was warming himself when he denied the Lord three times in the courtyard. Here, Jesus asks Simon Peter is he loves him three times as well. Understanding the Greek words for love, makes this passage so much more powerful.

Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Agápe] Me?”
Simon Peter said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I [Philia] You.”
He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”

Jesus said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Agápe] Me?”
He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I [Philia] You.”
He said to him, “Tend My sheep.”

Jesus said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you [Philia] Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you [Philia] Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I [Philia]You.”
Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.

Simon Peter is unable to give Jesus the specific kind of love Jesus asks from him. Simon Peter can give him virtuous love but is unable to offer a deep, everlasting, all-giving love. But Jesus finally accepts that Simon Peter is loving him as much as he is capable.

This makes me think about what kind of love I am giving the Lord? Philia or Agápe? Am I loving him the most that I possibly can? Hearing and understanding the Greek was a real news flash for me. I realized that I am capable of loving the Lord so much more than I already am. Why am I holding back? What's stopping me? Why am I afraid?

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Barbie and Her Effects on Youth

So I just wrote a paper on Barbie and her effects on youth. Although this is an argument you all have probably heard before, I thought it was interesting enough to share portions with you anyway.


There have been numerous debates over the effects of Barbie on young minds. How is Barbie affecting our youth? Is Barbie giving young girls wrongful expectations of their bodies? Or is she an icon for independence and strength? The primary reason that this debate over Mattel’s plastic doll is such a hot topic is because there is significant evidence to support both sides. In the article, “Dumb blonde – or diehard feminist?” written by Moira Redmond and Julie Bindel, it is easy to see both sides of this argument. While I never really had a strong opinion either way, Redmond and her multiple ideas on how Barbie is a role model for young girls seemed to be the better argument, convincing me that Barbie is not so dangerous for children after all.


As mentioned, the Barbie debate has come up plenty of times in the media. Most often you hear of the negative impact the doll is having on young girls. Bindel and others think that Barbie is giving our children the wrong message. The most common argument is based on Barbie’s figure and size: “Barbie syndrome strives for an unrealistic body type. If Barbie was life-size, she’d measure 36-18-33, stand five foot, nine inches tall, and weigh twelve to thirty-five pounds underweight for a woman of that height.” Critics are saying that this is a false image we are giving to our children. The last thing we want to do is encourage girls to be skinnier or tell girls that they are fat. This opinion is shared by Alisa L. Valdes, author of “Ruminations of a Feminist Fitness Instructor.” She states, “If a woman of Barbie’s proportions existed, she wouldn’t be able to walk, breathe, or digest food.”

Barbie creates and follows many gender stereotypes. According to the article, Barbie is “modeled on a German porn doll called Lillie.” There is a French Maid Barbie the Black Canary, hooker Barbie, Barbie with a wedding dress, Barbie as a nurse, and Barbie as Medusa. Bindel argues that these dolls are most often based on gender roles, convincing little girls that their future lies only in fashion, marriage, or pornography. There is even a phrase, “Barbie and Ken,” which is meant to classify “men and women who behave as their prescribed, polarized gender roles.” A woman’s role in society has progressed so much to where women are now pastors and political leaders and doctors, that we do not need a little doll retracting our advancement.

Although, Bindel makes many valid points, I do see the positive aspects of Barbie that Redmond points out in her section. She talks about the Barbie’s body shape, affordability, her independence of men, the variety of nationalities of dolls, and the argument that the doll stimulates the imagination and can be seen as a role model for any young girl. Redmond comments that Barbie “has impressive proportions, but they are by no means outside of the normal range.” She disagrees with Bindel who says that no real human being could ever be that skinny. Who’s actually right is debatable. Redmond explains that although Barbie has a multitude of accessories, buying only the Barbie is actually quite affordable, only about $15.00., which allows families of many classes to purchase this toy for their children. These dolls also come in a variety of nationalities, pushing diversity and acceptance to children and providing kids everywhere with a Barbie who relates to their culture.


The two most important arguments Bindel makes are Barbie’s independence and role model attributes. The doll is communicating to children that they can be anything they want to be, just like Barbie: a doctor, vet, astronaut, teacher, or firefighter. Barbie screams independence to young girls, whose brothers don’t have an equivalent toy. While the Ken doll does exist, Barbie is never portrayed as needing Ken to help her camp or sail or ship or mountain bike. She is autonomous and well-rounded, just like all women should grow up believing.


Because there are arguments for and against the Barbie, I do not think it’s feasible to start pulling them off the shelves. I personally think that more than anything, the Barbie doll inspires young girls to be interactive and let their imaginations run. I remember playing with Barbies as a young girl, and for me it was more about creating the world of Barbie in my mind through the design of her house, her job, and her family, than it was picking out her clothes and gloating about her skinny waist. I actually thought that changing her clothes and brushing her hair was too much work anyway. It gave me time to interact with my sisters and create a world all of our own with our dolls.


Sometimes I think that this whole debate on the Barbie doll and how it is affecting the world’s youth is a little over the top. I am not a psychiatrist or expert on children’s growth and maturity, but I sometimes feel that we analyze this way too much. Does a little girl really see her Barbie as herself? Does she know that she can be more than an object to men? And even so, buy the child a Barbie plus a G.I. Jane doll, a Tickle Me Elmo, and a box of Legos. This Barbie doll does not need to be the only toy that a child ever plays with.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Engaged?

No! Not me! I'm not engaged... But my oldest sister and her boyfriend just got engaged last night. Exciting stuff I know! So now two of my sisters have given in to love and are going to be/are hitched. Which leads me to think a lot about the idea...

I've always wanted and planned to get married right out of college, just because I figured the earlier you get married, the earlier you get to spend the rest of your life with that special someone. But here I am graduating and not married or engaged... Yes, I have a boyfriend, but we've only been dating five months now, and he still has two years of college left, so I am pretty sure that's not going to be happening anytime soon. And I wouldn't want it to, because it's way too early to start thinking about that. It's just that I'm only getting older, if you know what I mean.

But for some reason there is this crazy notion stuck in my head which I think is completely ridiculous, but for some preposterous reason I can't get it out... I feel like I'm in a rush to get married... like my life hasn't yet started and won't until I'm married, like the day there's a ring on my finger, will be the day all my problems go away, and I can live happily ever after for ever and ever. And I don't know why I feel this way, because all logic proves that as along as you and your guy are together you should be happy, whether or not you are married... And life before marriage might even be easier, because you don't have kids, a house payment, jobs, or in-laws to fight about... Plus, there are those marriages that don't make it and leave people scarred or confused or hurt for the rest of their lives, and I don't want that for myself either! So why do I feel like there is a piece of me waiting to be filled by my husband?

It's stupid really... And I don't know if it's the media's influence like people claim everything is these days, or if it's just this childhood fantasy of mine to have a beautiful wedding and get married to the guy of my dreams... Either way, I'm jealous of married couples. They seem so happy. And I just hope I am as happy as they all at least seem to be...

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Perception: An Email Forward

The Situation

In Washington D.C. at a Metro Station on a cold January morning in 2007, this man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, approximately 2,000 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

After 3 Minutes: A middle-aged man noticed that there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds then hurried on to meet his schedule.

About 4 Minutes Later: The violinist received his first dollar. A woman threw money into the hat and without stopping, continued to walk.

At 6 Minutes: A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started walk again.

At 10 Minutes: A three-year old boy stopped, but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head the whole time. The action was repeated by several other children, but every parent -without exception- forced their children to move on quickly.

At 45 Minutes: The musician played continuously. Only six people stopped and listened for a short while. About twenty gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.00.

After 1 Hour: He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed and no one applauded. There was no recognition at all.

No one was aware that this violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million. Two days before Joshua Bell sold out a theatre in Boston where seats sold for an average for $100 each to sit and listen to him play the same music.

The Experiment

This is a true story, Joshua Bell playing incognito in the D.C. Metro Station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste, and people's priorities. The experiment raised several questions. In a common place environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? If so, do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?

One Possible Conclusion

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made....

How many other things are we missing as we rush through life?

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Stuck in a Rut

Journal Entry: 4/9/2009

Holy Thursday. It has come so fast. So I evaluate myself. Have I become a better person throughout the Lenten season? Have I become a better Christian? Hard to know.

I think the answer lies in what I do when my sacrifices and goals are no longer obligations.

Today: 4/6/2010

Easter has come and gone. So I evaluate myself. Have I become a better person throughout the Lenten season? Have I become a better Christian? Hard to know.

I think the answer lies in what I do when my sacrifices and goals are no longer obligations.

This year I should really try to focus, so next Lent I can honestly say that yes, I am a better person and yes, I am a better Christian. I kind of feel like that's the point of Lent. Isn't it? And I feel like I just wasted yet another year, yet another Lent, stuck in the same old rut. It's kind of depressing...

Congratulations to you all were able to stand up and crawl out of the hole. Now... could you throw me down a rope?

Monday, April 5, 2010

Making Bank at the Local Clothes Closet

Have you ever been to your local community clothes closet? I had never been to the one in my home town before. I had always thought that the clothes closet was a place where people who did not have a lot of money could go to buy clothes. And it is, but I always thought it would be really bad for someone like me, who isn't much in need, to go and shop. If I did, I would feel like I was stealing from the needy. But then I found out that our local clothes closet actually wants people like me to go in and purchase house/decor items in order to raise money to fund the clothes closet and food pantry. Hundreds of house/decor items are donated to them everyday, but people in need don't go to the clothes closet to buy decorative vases, pearl necklaces, or a 16 piece knife set. They go to buy the necessities: clothes, toiletry items, food, etc. So while home over Easter Break, my mom, my sister, and I decided to check it out!

We went, we shopped, we bought tons of items for way under value, and we were able to donate to a local charity. Let's just say we made bank in more ways than one! And I walked out happy!

As most of my readers know, I love to shop, and I am going to have to furnish an apartment upon graduation. So for the a whopping grand total of $17.75, I got a four piece canister set for flour, sugar, powdered sugar, and brown sugar; a set of eight, 16 oz. glasses; a set of five decorative glasses, a Pyrex measuring bowl, a string of pearls, a pastry sifter, and a decorative wooden bowl to go on my kitchen table. Isn't that awesome?

So the moral of the story... check out your local clothes closet. Get some great buys while donating to people in need. It's a win-win situation! Don't you just love those...

Friday, April 2, 2010

Beyond this World

Here I am. Did ya miss me? I'm finally blogging again. It's been awhile. But I've been busy. And now it's Easter break, so I've found some time.

Today was my first outdoor track meet of the season. I don't know if I mentioned that I threw the javelin in track, (you know that long pointy pole that looks like a spear). Ya, I throw that in track, and today was my first meet.

I was originally really worried about this meet. Because One: It was my first of the season. Two: I won the meet last year, so I was expected to do well again. And Three: I had a prior throw listed that I wasn't sure I could surpass... but my Mom and my sister, who happens to be my coach, were both there watching me, so I had some help... and two cheerleaders.

The Results: I threw a total of four out of my six throws farther than I have ever thrown. I P.R.'d by approx. 12 feet. I won the meet, and I missed out on provisionally qualifying for the National meet by only one foot. And I did all this with an hour and half break in between my preliminary and final throws due to lightening, after eating a fish sandwich and french fries, on a wet runway, and with a confidence that was mysteriously placed inside me after my first throw. It was amazing! Give me a jav and ask me to throw it to the moon? I could do it today. Somehow...

I just need to remember this feeling on the days I feel like I can do nothing right, on the days that I can't get the jav anywhere near that prior throw listed. I need to remember that even though that day, I might not be at my best, there once was a day I was. And it will happen again for me. Because that confidence was placed in me by a power that is completely beyond this world... and the moon.

So ask me again... give me a jav and ask me to throw it to the moon... And I will throw it further. God willing.